Love ~ I am in, or when was the last time I've been in ...

Is just i tell my friends that i like her, and i shouldn't tell it.... and people just starting to tell everyone so i got reject badly

 

Ah...that's too bad. It seems that you tell your feeling to the wrong friend who can't keep a secret. Well if that's the situation, you already got rejected, why don't you start to find a new girl that you can like?

 

Hey, I kinda know how that's like. Take it this way: she's not the one for you, and you'll probably find someone better. And we sure hope you do.

Edit: Also take note that this is coming from someone who has never had any success in the field of romance.

 

Uchi is right. There are lots of better girls out there waiting for you. You just have to find the right one for you, that's all.

 

This is quickly becoming my favourite thread on all of S48. I just when through the first 15 pages slowly, and gawd, the this is one of most thought/emotional-evoking place I've been on all teh intarwebs combined. Woah. Continuing...

Edit: Been reading on and off, slowly. Can't go speedreading because of how it loses me in my own thoughts and the sheer number of walls-of-text in here. Not having any incentive to proper formatting and proof-reading on forums could be blamed, I guess. Page 28.

Edit 2: Started scanning through posts instead of taking the time to read. This thread does have its powers. It's drawn a lot of people out of their innanet-barrierz™ and talking. That alone, is completely amazing. Page 40 now, won't be much longer.

Edit 3: Waking up at 3am sucks. But what else have I got but teh innanets? Scanned through the all the pages here. /me crawls back into his shell.

Edit 4: Lots of stories, lots of advice, a lot of stuff I totally agree on, feel for, but most of all, I'm interested in CDevil's story. Because I can totally relate on the long-running relationship with all the mixed signals. Ugh. Maybe I'll post here again when I've sorted out my thoughts.

 

Shin-koda that's too bad. I had an experience like that and needless to say I am no longer friends with the girl that told everyone.

Luckily a few years have passed and I can talk to the guy as a friend and no longer have feelings for him.

So there's still hope. I've moved on so although it may be hard I'm sure in the end you'll be able to too.

 

@ Uchiha : Yes this is one emotionally-involved thread, a very great thread made by qilver. Too bad he isn't coming here as often as he used to. But it's okay, maybe he's kinda too busy now to read long replies and problems here. I still be able to take care of things here.

It's great that you read carefully all the pages here, yeah those pages contain so many interesting, be it sad or good stories about members here and their experience towards love and relationship. Those are the real treasure of this forum, I think. cause it's rare to people here in the internet that can trust other members well enough to share their deep, intimate experiences.

Let's keep this thread continue.

 

^ Yeah, the q-man did a pretty good job with the thread, some really sensible advice here and there when people were feeling less-than-sensible, and sharing lots of his personal experience, but woah, someone really needs to learn some formatting. Just sayin'.

Isn't it amazing how many of us are completely unabashed about our idol/other wota love and fantasies, but are really just next to hopeless when it comes to romantic relationships? Then again, it isn't that surprising now is it.

 

I think if you look at things, and make it not as a big deal, or big problem, then it will not be so serious. I know asking a girl out you really really like is going to cause big nervous feelings inside of you, BUT if you just take action, and not think, and over think, BECAUSE we as humans tend to over-analyze, over-think on things too much and it causes us to NOT take action, when we really want to. I still do this, but i try to make it an effort to just go for it, and even if i make a mistake badly, atleast i know that i tried, and gave it a good effort, even if I still didn't get to accomplish my goal, however simple it may be.

Of course, it really depends on each different scenario and the person's background and phase of life. I mean for you, you are in school right? and you have a lot of years of dating ahead of you, as some of us on here have had that experience already in dating. Each time, it is new, and we learn a new thing from the process of pursuing, dating, etc...and if we can learn even the simplest thing, of our mistakes, or our successes, it will make us a better person to date, and to also help others too.

In all honesty, and i am still trying to understand and learn this even at my age, and dating experiences, the key to all this is handling, and constantly learning over and over to handle....rejection. The better we can recover from that "rejection", the better we can get to where we ultimately want to be, and in this case, it is in a dating relationship. It takes steps to get there, and going out there and taking a risk, is probably the hardest and first step, as small or large as it may seem.
Facing rejection, and getting back on your feet, regathering yourself after being rejecting, humilated(if you were), and just know that the emotions and feelings you endure to get thru that, that you are not alone, because each and every human being, goes through the same thing, just in their own ways. How we handle rejection, and get through dating, life, etc, is how we can perservere(get through) it all, and move on.

best of luck to you on anything.

 

I think Kyu, and others on here have really picked up the pace and brought this thread to where it is today. I kinda jump started it, and from time to time, added my 3 cents of words in it, and the ppl kind just took it from there. I honestly would like to give credit to the ppl that post on here adding what they want to share, and for others like Kyu, albus, etc...just sharing and helping others. I haven't had too much to add recently, and i have been quite inactive on this thread for many reason, but i do hope i can still add some of my words in from time to time.
I think if ppl can understand that a wotalike-ness point of view is just pure fantasy and just that, and nothing more, then it can be safe. When it becomes much more, and replaces that true real intimacy that only another can provide in that way, then i think there is much need for concern. I think for a single person, such as myself and others on here, it can be convenient, and easy to fall back on AKB48, and idol-wota world. But realistically, if one enters a relationship, with a real person, then their schedule, and life gets filled in a different way, and there is less time if any, for other wota-like activities. Can there be both? it really depends, but i would say that it would be hard to have, a regular relationship and be into H!P, MM, and other full time idol groups, and be hardcore. I just don't think it is possible, unless your so-called significant other would be in those too, and you share a passion for idol-wota, which i find rare, or that your significant other would be open to allowing you to be into that stuff, my guess is a "no", probably. I would make a good guess that most male-japanese and others there in Japan that are so into AKB48, either are single by choice, or just have nothing romantically going on, so they make AKB48 their need for intimacy. Not that i find that all-wrong, because to a point, it is one of my daily passions too, but i try my best to distinguish between cute-idol-girl fantasy, and what is reality, even if romantically that could be quite dry right now, as for me, and probably for many others too. And if it makes the Japanese/non-Japanese wota happy, then i think that could be a good thing, a good diversion, a good fantasy, whatever works, right?.

 

ok, more to add, and from the q this time.

first date jitters
let just say i finally went on a first date, thanks to my co-worker indirectly setting me up with this girl. I was open to it, and a bit anxious, excited, yet calm about the whole thing. I quite honestly, taking it for what it is, and nothing more. I think first date jitters, nervousness is quite normal and expected. I go through it every time i go out with a new girl. The girl i went out today was sweet, and a bit younger than me, but I think it was ok as we had an ok time. I think conversation takes practice and i don't claim to have it smooth all the time, but i did my best to ask inquisitive yet not too personal questions for the girl, especially on the first date. I would like to make her feel at ease, yet comfortable, but i do realize that i cannot make it all perfect. Anyways, we went out for lunch, and a snack afterward, then we parted ways. I asked most of the questions and she responded politely, and was friendly but i can sense her lack of dating exp, probably cause i am a bit older with more dating experiences. I have no idea what she is feeling or if there will be a second but i can say is that she was sweet, and i am glad to have met her and gone out. I would be open to meeting up with her again, for another date, but that would be if she open to it as well. I will probably send her an email/text later in the week and see what's up, and let her know i had a good time the other day, etc.....i know how it all goes. If there is nothing, i quite honestly would not have a problem it, and how the dating scene/game works.
My cousin is trying to set me up with this other gal, who i have been emailing back and forth for over a month now, and its been going well, but i have plans on meeting her next week. And online dating, even if it has produced little results, i do have a few girls i am in contact with, but it can easily fizzle to nothing. I just know as a single, I have to be open to new opportunities, and risks, I hope in 2009 i start a new relationship.
I have the same nervous, uneasy, awkward feelings as many other first-daters experience, and i can tell you, it is never easy, but it is important to try to be yourself, have fun, and be open to whatever happens. The results may disappoint you, and they make you feel wonderful, who really knows, but I think we need to remember, that love is out there, and it happens when you least expect it. So far, April has made a good start, and i do again feel the "hope" that i have lost in the past few months, i do hope it can be regained for others as well on here, thanks for listening.

 

Sounds like chances aplenty for the q-man.
I wish you the best of luck.

 

at my age, i take what is given, and what opportunities arise.
thanks for listening, and do share your story, i'm all ears.
i am sure i will have lots more to say.

 

Still, sounds like you're off to a great start. I wish I could say the same about myself. I can't even open myself to "opportunities", despite how hard I try.

 

i am sure that if you try to create some opportunities for yourself, something good will happen, whether it be meeting a girl through mutual friends(networking, the best method in my personal opinion and quickest way), online dating, and other alternatives, like speed dating, meeting randomly at the store, or wherever...i think that is the hardest method though.

I think its a good start i am off to, but yet...i feel first or even second dates don't amount to a whole lot, because i have been there so many times, and ultimately what i strive for is a long term relationship, intimately, to me that has great significance, and meaning. This whole dating process that leads to that, almost seems secondary, and i won't say it is wasteful, but it seems so little in comparison. It really does take two to tango, i am still hoping one of these great wonderful girls, meets me half way, a good way to look at it.

best of luck to you, and take some risks, i sure have!

 

The time has come at last
To throw away this mask
Now everyone can see
My true identity...
I'm not a robot without emotions - I'm not what you see
I've got a secret i've been hiding under my skin
So if you see me acting strangely, don't be surprised
I'm not a hero, i'm not a saviour, forget what you know
I am the modren man, who hides behind a mask
So no one else can see my true identity
You're wondering who i am - machine or mannequin
My heart is human, my blood is boiling, my brain IBM
Mata au hi made
With parts made in japan, i am the modren man
I'm just a man who needed someone, and somewhere to hide
Himitsu wo shiritai
I'm not a hero, i'm not a saviour, forget what you know
I'm just a man whose circumstances went beyond his control
With parts made in japan, I am the modren man
Thank you, thank you, thank you
For helping me escape just when i needed to
For doing the jobs that nobody wants to
Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto
And thank you very much, Mr. Roboto
I'm Kilroy! Kilroy! Kilroy! Kilroy!
I want to thank you, please, thank you

Did you like it?

 

~ Nice one.. Itachi ~

 

^
^
quite the creative lyric, poetic, expression that i have seen, and yes longest post, but not word by word, i still take the cake...whatever that means.

anyhow, i just figured out that it is our self-doubt that usually tanks ourselves, and it psyches us all out of the opportunities. I hope that i am not letting it get the best of me, regarding yesterday's date, i just have tons on my mind now. I have a plenty of doubts that flooded my mind when i woke up this morning about that girl, and now i am thinking, maybe this won't work out, but somehow i need to ask her out again, to see if i get a response. I mean, quite honestly, i really don't know if she is interested, being cordial, polite could be a cover up to say, i think you are nice but............ those dreaded thoughts and words, but it could be because she is not an open person, and younger than me, and more inexperienced in dating/relationships....who really knows, i just know i am in a world of doubt right now, i think this is common.

 

Heh, the whole point was to not let my post look like empty, but more importantly...
Secret Secret, I've got a secret.

 

sometimes, "himitsu" can be a good thing...ssshhhhh!!

but if you can share, pls do, then i can get my analysis out, and dish out.